Tough Love

Someone once told me that I'm not easy to love...

... A year ago I would greatly disagree but today I could not agree more with that person. Perhaps because I already proved to myself that this piece of information is true. It could not be more evident in the failed relationships I had for the past two years. 

It's crazy to think that a past relationship might have worked if only I didn't build walls instead of bridges. Or maybe things would be different at the moment if only I stopped pushing them away so hard, thinking and hoping that they have the patience within them to come back and soothe my flaming pride. I know no one could settle for that disturbing circumstances. Even I would not settle for that..

So with that realization I took sometime and tried to change myself for the better. I started forgiving myself and learning to accept that certain people can love and accept who I really am. I stopped pushing people away and accepted their love with open arms. I became the most lovable person until.... I fell in love once again.

And to make matters worse? The person I fell in love is kind, forgiving and understanding. This person possesses the traits that I so love to abuse. I tried to stay away from the sweet temptation of testing the limits of this person. But tonight, I couldn't stop myself. The cycle of monstrosity repeats itself once again...

Considering this, should I stop and let go in order to spare an innocent loving heart or should I fight and acknowledge the fact that everything is tough when it comes to love?