Hiatus

One of the scariest thing a blogger could encounter is a blank page. This is often what we hear from writer(s)/blogger(s) who is/are currently experiencing a hiatus. It's cliche but it's true.I can attest to that..

I admit I am not a professional blogger. I normally write my thoughts just when life gets a little crazy at times. However for several months already I found a shocking change that left me lifeless for a great time. I realized that my life became monotonous, dry, and uneventful. Therefore, I can't produce a single post for this blog, which by the way I promised to update as often as possible.

That realization brought so much unhappiness and the feeling of discontentment wont leave me. 

Days passed and nothing great happened. Everyday I would wake up in the morning, do may morning routine, rush for school, hang out and eat lunch with my friends, attend classes, see Miko, finish my responsibilities in the council (if there are any), then home sweet home. The following day will be the same routine. On some days I'd hang out with Miko and leave my friends for awhile on other days I'd just be busy as hell. It was dreadful. I was discontented. I felt hollow... no I felt empty!

http://analogcolor.tumblr.com/post/18075317347/365wonderlandadventures-on-flickr

I felt like a different person.  Like a different dissatisfied person is living inside my body. To make matters worse I was always lethargic, grumpy even confused and angry at times. I hated noisy people. My tolerance for bullshit dropped to a zero. My relationships were affected. My mom and I would bicker to an extent that we no longer speak. To even further complicate my situation I can't find a good reason why I turned into this anti-social monster. So I took desperate steps and went to a guidance councilor. But then she wasn't any help. That is why I took matters into my own hands. 

I started praying.

Every night before I go to sleep I would think hard and ask the All Knowing what was happening to my life. I asked Him all sorts of question ranging from "Where are You?" to "Why am I so unhappy?"
.....Of course He did not answer me because it was never His "thing" to answer people that way but rather He makes us feel things and guide us towards the light.

So one morning as I was getting ready for school I saw this book that my mom and I shared. It has a title of "A Pocketful of Promises" It is a compilation of 100 love notes from God.  I leafed through the book and searched for the following things:

1. God's Promise For My Doubts:
and this is what He said: "My Child I know you are struggling with doubt, but deep inside your spirit I have given you faith to move mountains. Let My precious promises wash you doubts away. I will never leave you, fail you, or forsake you. I am always with you; you are never alone. When you feel like giving up, cast your care and burdens upon Me. Rest in My arms and trust Me to take care of all that concerns you. I love you. Lift your eyes to the Heavens, for I am your help. Call on Me, and I will restore you. Hope in Me for I am here" - GOD

2. God's Promise For My Dreams:
and this is what He said: "Beloved, Dream big dreams. Many of your dreams are My dreams for you life. I share your excitement for the future, and I have big plans for you. I have held them in my heart since before you were born. I want to see them become a reality as much as you do. Trust Me to fulfill my plans for you life. I have a path in mind for you to follow. Trust and follow Me on your journey. With Me, all things are possible-- only believe!"- GOD

3. God's Promise When I Feel Confused:
and this is what He said: "Child of mine, I am not the author of confusion. Rather, I am the Shepherd of your soul. I desire to lead you, My sheep, into the green pastures of peace and confidence. When you feel confused, come to Me and I will settle your mind until you can hear Me clearly again. I can replace uncertainty with wisdom, shine the light of truth on the situations in your life, and set you free to make good choices." -GOD

As I put down that book that day, I also put down all my doubts and confusion. I knew there was nothing wrong with me. I was fine. It was just I wanted more than what I had which made a hole in my life. So, starting that day I lived my life a little differently and most of all I started thanking God even for the most little blessing. Thus I started becoming happy and at peace once again.....


I guess our lives as human beings is not as uneventful like we think it is. In fact it is filled with opportunities and chances to make it fun and worth sharing. However it is we who failed to see these blessings for we often ask for more or look for something else. This experience will serve me as a reminder that if ever I am faced again with a blank page and no enough worthy words can fill the spaces, I will look back and think that it takes time to tell a good story. I just need to sit back and relax and let the story unfold.

....and with these realizations and experiences I create a new post for my blog. 

http://www.flickr.com/photos/cmingkit/6869380195/in/pool-1267944@N22/